Two Secrets We Choose

Part 4A of The Greatest of These, inspired by 1 Corinthians 13.

The oaks in Craig Park arched overhead like a green cathedral, their branches sketching lacework shadows across Spring Bayou. Boats drifted by in the soft evening light. Friends and family formed a quiet semicircle as Retina and Omar stepped forward with their children, Kamron and DJ, in a small town outside of Tampa, Florida—Tarpon Springs—ready to renew the promise they first made years ago.

“Good evening, everyone,” I began. “When I met with Retina and Omar to plan today, a theme quickly surfaced—patience and kindness. Those two quiet strengths kept showing up in their love story, not as perfect moments, but as daily choices. I’d like to frame our time with a line that has guided them: ‘Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud’ (1 Corinthians 13:4, NIV).”

I glanced at the couple. “Patience and kindness don’t grow on their own; they aren’t organic. They’re secrets we choose, again and again. And today, Retina and Omar would like to share a few words with each other—with all of us as witnesses.”

Omar turned to Retina, his voice steady. “I used to think love meant solving things. You’d start to share your day, and I’d jump in with answers. These last years, I’ve learned the kind of patience that listens first. Sometimes you didn’t need a fix—you needed my full attention, my hand in yours, and the space to breathe. I choose that kind of patience with you.”

Retina smiled, eyes bright. “And I choose kindness—the kind that shows up in small ways. I tuck notes into your lunch because I want you to carry my voice with you: I see you. I believe in you. I love you. When you text back that one of those notes made you smile, it reminds me that the little things are never little with you.”

A ripple of warmth moved through the circle. Kamron stepped forward, placing a single white flower in a small vase beside his mother. “They do that,” he said softly, and a few people laughed through happy tears. DJ handed the rings to his father and added, “They also pause before they argue. Sometimes we see them take a walk, then come back and talk it through.” The children stepped back between their parents, a picture of the home these promises had built.

“Retina and Omar,” I said, “when you first spoke vows, love was a promise. Today it is a practice. If you wish, speak these simple words after me.”

They nodded, and together they repeated:

“I choose patience when words come fast.”

“I choose kindness when days feel hard.”

“I choose you—today, tomorrow, always.”

They slipped the rings back onto each other’s hands. The bayou breeze lifted, as if to seal the moment.

I turned to the guests. “For everyone here—and for those reading this later—notice how their love works in the everyday. It isn’t grand gestures alone; it’s habits of the heart. If you’re looking for ways to bring more patience and kindness into your own marriage, try what this family practices:

• Pause before you reply. Breathe, then listen all the way through.
• Ask, ‘Do you want me to listen or help?’ and honor the answer.
• Leave a note in a lunch bag, on a mirror, or tucked in a wallet.
• Show up on hard days with a small kindness—coffee, water, a warm hand.
• Hold hands before you part and again when you reunite.
• End the day with, ‘What made you smile today?’ and let that be enough.”

Retina and Omar faced one another again. “I choose you,” they whispered together, and when they kissed, applause broke into the soft sound of the water and the distant bell of St. Nicholas. The children wrapped their arms around them, and for a moment, everything was still—the oaks, the bayou, the busy world beyond the park.

A vow renewal is more than remembering a wedding; it’s renewing a way of life. It shows your children, your friends, and your own heart that love doesn’t simply last—it grows when you choose it.

If reading this has you picturing your own moment under the oaks—or wherever your story feels most like home—I would be honored to craft it with you. Call or text 813‑239‑4117 to plan a vow renewal that reflects your journey and invites your family to witness the two secrets you choose, until your home is filled with Joy for a Lifetime.